Good News if You’re a Dysfunctional Whack-Job!
For too long now all the lazy, dysfunctional people of the world had to make their way by either sapping the charity of others or living on the government dole.
I’m not talking about un-skilled people who often have to take menial jobs until they learn valuable trades or develop the discipline that will allow them to move up through an organization, adding greater and greater value as they grow. I’m talking about the people of the world who are so emotionally disturbed that they simply can’t (or won’t) hold down a job where they work to contribute to society in a way that rewards them for their labors.
I just learned that T.O. (Tyrell Owens, professional-football-player-slash-gangster-wannabe) is now on a reality Television show. This is GREAT!
He’s following in the footsteps of other world-class losers like the Octo-mom who has no job, no husband or partner, and no source of income but was able to convince a fertility doctor to impregnate her with eight viable, fertilized eggs and gave birth like a bitch to a litter of puppies (I use the term here only in it’s legitimate use, not as the more often used slang definition, though either might apply).
Fortunately for the taxpayers, the Octo-mom was able to secure a deal for a reality TV show as well. While some have lamented this as a sign of the imminent collapse of society as we know it, I contend that this is proof that Capitalism works if we give it a chance.
I still think the doctor in question should have his license revoked as he clearly failed to uphold his moral duties charged him as a graduate of medical school. But I am also glad that this otherwise non-producer (and rabid RE-producer!) is able to earn a living and should hopefully be able to pay for at least the basic needs of her ridiculously large, single-parent family without too much assistance from you and me as taxpayers.
Of course, we owe all this to the likes of Paris Hilton, who had a monthly allowance from daddy bigger than most of us earn in a really good year but was willing to sacrifice her thin wisp of dignity in order to blaze a new trail for fellow whack-jobs who were not so fortunate to be born multi-billionaires. Her willingness to expose her lunacy on national TV for money that she clearly did not need, opened doors for fellow lunatics who might otherwise have to live on taxpayer assistance.
So for all the people who hear voices in the night telling them to shave their heads or drown their babies, for all the washed-up celebrities and musicians who squandered the millions they made when times were good, for all the athletes who could make hundreds of millions of dollars playing a game they love if they could only learn to get along with others, EMBRACE your new career as a reality TV star and thank Paris Hilton for showing you the way.
I agree. Bottom line Socialism = FAIL.
Those that won in life being penalized and sentenced to paying for the half of society that fails at the very same thing. Try finding a long standing beacon of Socialism in this world, I’ve never seen one that rivaled a capitalist U.S.A.
I know exactly how you feel. I live in a country where the social grants went from 2 billion to 12 billion in 5 years and the goverment sees this as a good thing. Government jobs are only given to friends who don’t need to have the relavent qualifications. Our new president only has a grade 8. Little surprise that Zimbabwe went from a African country powerhouse to the poorest country in the world.
Had a bad day?
Pretty funny Julian - and so true. One question though, did you shave YOUR head because you heard voices in the night?
Hey Maggie! (I know your post lists you as Margaret, but you’re still Maggie to me).
I will tell you that I didn’t really pick my hairstyle (or lack thereof). My grandfather gave that hairstyle to me. He passed it down through my mother who never saw any need for it on herself and I guess thought I might like an early inherentance.
I tried for quite some time to keep what little I could still grow and finally decided that I should just embrace simplicity and relish the fact that I no longer have to spend time or money in the barber shop.
I see your point, Julian, but Paris Hilton doesn’t belong on this list. The fact is that she has learned how to play the celebrity game, and her clothing, perfume and jewelry lines are successful businesses that have made more millions than she will ever inherit from the Hilton fortune. She is a savvy businesswoman in her own way, and VERY good at gaming both the media and the public, who are convinced she’s a blonde bimbo. She makes an interesting case study. We could debate the value of the celebrity culture she makes her money from, but don’t call Paris Hilton a loser, at least not if you’re measuring success in money EARNED.
Eric,
If we debated about Paris Hilton it would only be about the degree of her insight. I agree that she is quite savvy and understands how to position herself in the marketplace. Like you, I believe that her persona is contrived and calculated, though I’m not sure if it is a viable long-term strategy so I’m interested in seeing how she ultimately reinvents herself.
I would argue that her own enterprises are nowhere NEAR as successful as what her grandfather assembled (which is well over $2 Billion) but you are correct that she has probably earned more than she’ll inherit since the Hilton patriarch announced that only 3% of his fortune would pass to his heirs with the rest going to charity.
Still, let’s not ignore the fact that Paris blazed the way for this sort of carnival side-show self-exposure to become a profit center. Prior to Paris Hilton, loony freaks could only get face time on Jerry Springer which doesn’t really pay. Paris taught a nation of viewers to appreciate this sort of soap opera and taught a nation of unstable individuals with no self-pride how to exploit that voyeuristic impulse for a book-deal advance and television residuals.@Eric Henning